I’m terrible at accepting help.
I’m pretty certain it has something to do with my control issues, my invincibility complex, and my guilt over taking something I can’t reciprocate. I recently turned down several amazing offers for help from several amazing people. Then, one day, I didn’t. A mother I know from my older son’s preschool years texted me that she read my post, and wanted to help. She wanted to take all 3 of my kids, and asked ‘how about tomorrow afternoon?’ I was tired, it was hot, and I saw it as an offer than would be silly to refuse. I accepted the help, and admitted to her that I never accept help from anyone. She responded that her MIL always said,
Take the cookies when they are passed.
What a wonderful phrase. That Friday afternoon without my kids was great. I took a nap. I sat down when I ate dinner. When my husband got home we had an actual uninterrupted conversation about all this crazy health stuff I’m going through. I was, and am, grateful. My children came home happy, too.
The weeks that followed offered a few more opportunities to accept help when I needed to go to Boston for several doctor’s appointments. I could have taken my kids (and their LeapPads) with me, but it would’ve been a pain in the you know what. So I actually took a friend up on her offer to take my kids strawberry picking while I went to the doctor. Another hosted my kids for a water filled play date complete with GF animal crackers. I even let my forever friend take my kids for the whole day so I could rest after the appointment. It might not seem like a big deal to you, but it was to me.
It’s hard to accept help. The thing is, friends want to help you. At least my friends want to help me. They even tell me that they benefit because it makes them feel good, too. I understand, because when I’m able, I do the same thing. I’m always up for bringing meals to neighbors and friends when they welcome a new baby (veggie chili, anyone?). I want to help. It feels good to be the one offering the plate of cookies.
As always, it’s about balance. One day I will be the helper. Right now, I just need to accept the cookies that other people are offering to me. And when I’m all filled up and feeling my best again, you bet I’ll be baking. Because, after all, who doesn’t like cookies?
We all need to take the cookies when they are passed.
And since some of you probably thought this was a cookie recipe, I’ll oblige. Here’s what I’m making when I’m up for it.
- ⅔ cup plus ½ cup oat flour (To make oat flour, you can simply grind up rolled GF oats in a food processor)
- ¼ tsp salt
- ½ tsp baking soda
- ¼ cup brown sugar or coconut sugar
- ¼ cup granulated sugar of choice
- ¼ cup thinly-crushed pretzels (GF for us)
- 2 tbsp shredded coconut OR rolled oats
- ½ cup chocolate chips
- 1¼ tsp pure vanilla extract
- 2 tbsp vegetable oil or melted coconut oil
- 2-5 tbsp milk of choice, only as needed
- Preheat your oven to 380 degrees and grease a cookie tray (of use Silpat like me!)
- In a large bowl, combine first 8 ingredients and mix very well.
- Add wet ingredients, and form into one big ball.
- Now make little balls from the big one.
- For softer cookies, refrigerate or freeze the dough until cold (for crispy cookies, just bake right away).
- For soft cookies, bake 7 minutes, then remove from oven when they still look quite undercooked.
- It’s important to let the cookies cool at least 10 minutes before touching them, as they’ll firm up considerably while cooling.
- For crispier cookies, bake until they are only slightly undercooked.
- For soft and chewy cookies, store in a lidded plastic container. For crispy cookies, store in a lidded glass container for up to 4 days
- You can also freeze the dough balls for up to a month before baking.
- Read more at http://chocolatecoveredkatie.com/2014/12/01/chocolate-chip-cowboy-cookies/#z4OoFbTeILwFuQfj.99
*Photo Credit: <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/photos/91842418@N00/9314022683/”>mroth</a> via <a href=”http://compfight.com”>Compfight</a> <a href=”https://www.flickr.com/help/general/#147″>cc</a>